Bob Van Oosterhout

Week 34 Daily Dose of Love
Home
Support Opportunity & Service Circles - A Neigborhood Organizing Tool
About Bob (...What about Bob?)
Anger and Impulse Control
Anxiety, Depression, PTSD
Balance
Behavioral Health Integration with Primary Care
Bring Truth to Fear: We CAN Work Together
Counseling
Hard Times Cafe Model of Empowerment
Leadership
Links to Videos for Online Stress Management at LCC
Love
Managing Chronic Pain and Headaches
Mental Health
Moral Philosophy
Pictures
Politics
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Practical Psychology: What Works and Makes Sense
Problem Solving - Responding Effectively to Problems
Slow Down and Lighten Up
Spiritual Writing
Stress Management
Videos
What Works
Resume/Curriculum Vitae
Comments, Suggestions, Discussion

Week 34 Daily Dose of Love

 

#232 (8/20)

Woman Caught in Adultery

John 7:53-8:11

Then each of them went home, while Jesus went to the Mount of Olives.  Early in the morning he came again to the temple. All the people came to him and he sat down and began to teach them.  The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery; and making her stand before all of them, they said to him, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the very act of committing adultery.  Now in the law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?”  They said this to test him, so that they might have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground.  When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let anyone among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.”  And once again he bent down and wrote on the ground.  When they heard it, they went away, one by one, beginning with the elders; and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him.  Jesus straightened up and said to her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?”  She said, “No one, sir.” And Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you. Go your way, and from now on do not sin again.”

 The scribes and Pharisees tried to set a trap for Jesus.  If he condemned the woman, he would violate Roman law, which does not allow Jews to carry out capital punishment.  If he freed her, he would violate the Law of Moses. When we find ourselves in this kind of situation we tend to throw up our arms and say we have no choice - we’re stuck between a rock and a hard place. Love always presents a fresh choice.  It opens a view from within our hearts, which sees beyond man-made rocks and hard places.   Jesus challenges the scribes and Pharisees to look at their own hearts and they walk away, one-by-one.  The woman caught in adultery shows more heart than any of them.  She had the opportunity to sneak away while Jesus was writing in the dirt but she stands in front of him quietly acknowledging her sin.  Jesus sees courage and potential that was hidden from the judging eyes of the scribes and Pharisees and does not condemn her.  Instead, he encourages her to sin no more. Love finds a way to move forward if we have the courage to stand before Jesus and acknowledge our weakness and vulnerability.  

Reflection/Discussion:

How can we learn to love those we tend to judge?

 

Principles of Love:

Acceptance; Compassion

 

Pray Through the Day:

Not my will

But yours be done

   

#233 (8/21)

Light of the World

 

John 8:12-20

Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but will have the light of life.”  Then the Pharisees said to him, “You are testifying on your own behalf; your testimony is not valid.”  Jesus answered, “Even if I testify on my own behalf, my testimony is valid because I know where I have come from and where I am going, but you do not know where I come from or where I am going.  You judge by human standards; I judge no one.  Yet even if I do judge, my judgment is valid; for it is not I alone who judge, but I and the Father who sent me. In your law it is written that the testimony of two witnesses is valid.  I testify on my own behalf, and the Father who sent me testifies on my behalf.”  Then they said to him, “Where is your Father?” Jesus answered, “You know neither me nor my Father. If you knew me, you would know my Father also.”  He spoke these words while he was teaching in the treasury of the temple, but no one arrested him, because his hour had not yet come.

 

Love brings light to potential and possibility with understanding and empathy.  The nature of love is to open our heart to another and desire what is best for them in the long run.  When we love, we see with a new light that exposes what is most real and true.   Judgment turns us away from that light so that we see only what we think we know.  It closes our mind, limits possibility, and cancels potential. 

 Jesus has every right to judge because he is the Son of God and sees clearly what’s in our hearts through eyes of love.  But he says that he judges “no one.” Jesus makes it very clear that we, who are limited by human standards and partial vision, have no business judging the sins of others. 

Our business as Christians is to absorb the light and carry it with us into the darkness of a world where it is much easier to judge than to love.

  

Reflection/Discussion:

What are human standards for judging?

 

Principles of Love:

Opening

 

Pray Through the Day:

Open our hearts

To your love

  

#234 (8/22)

Discussion with the Jews

 

John 8:21-30

Again he said to them, “I am going away, and you will search for me, but you will die in your sin. Where I am going, you cannot come.”  Then the Jews said, “Is he going to kill himself? Is that what he means by saying, ‘Where I am going, you cannot come’?”  He said to them, “You are from below, I am from above; you are of this world, I am not of this world.  I told you that you would die in your sins, for you will die in your sins unless you believe that I am he.”  They said to him, “Who are you?” Jesus said to them, “Why do I speak to you at all?  I have much to say about you and much to condemn; but the one who sent me is true, and I declare to the world what I have heard from him.”  They did not understand that he was speaking to them about the Father.  So Jesus said, “When you have lifted up the Son of Man, then you will realize that I am he, and that I do nothing on my own, but I speak these things as the Father instructed me.  And the one who sent me is with me; he has not left me alone, for I always do what is pleasing to him.”  As he was saying these things, many believed in him.

 Those who believed in Jesus opened their hearts to him and experienced the love of God through him.  Those who questioned and challenged Jesus had no clue who he was because they had closed their hearts and could not see that he came to us through his father’s love.   Trying to understand Jesus’ message without love is like trying to view a rainbow through a black and white viewfinder.  We can spend hours analyzing the meaning of various shades of grey while totally missing the subtle beauty of sunlight intermingling with moisture in the air. 

The world presents us with many different viewfinders.  We need to see through the eyes that are connected to our hearts.

  

Reflection/Discussion:

How do we believe with our hearts?

 

Principles of Love:

Opening; Vision

 

Pray Through the Day:

Open our hearts

To your love

   

 #235 (8/23)

The Truth Will Make You Free

John 8:31-36

Then Jesus said to the Jews who had believed in him, “If you continue in my word, you are truly my disciples; and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.”  They answered him, “We are descendants of Abraham and have never been slaves to anyone. What do you mean by saying, ‘You will be made free’?”

 

Jesus answered them, “Very truly, I tell you, everyone who commits sin is a slave to sin.  The slave does not have a permanent place in the household; the son has a place there forever.  So if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed.”

  Sin enslaves us because it turns us away from love, which is both our origin and destiny.  Sin requires that we close our hearts as it exaggerates self-centered needs and desires. It builds walls that dominate our vision and limit our choices while providing the illusion of freedom. Sin results when we follow impulses.  True freedom is spontaneous.  Impulsiveness is very different from spontaneity.  Impulses are self-centered.  They entice us to do what we feel like at the moment, to react to narrow perceptions without concern for long-term effects or consequences.  Spontaneity involves being in touch with where we are and where we are headed.  It is a natural and effortless response to the needs and opportunities of the present moment that connects us with the flow of God’s love that reaches toward every human heart.   True freedom allows us to become who we were created to be.  It allows us realize that we are fully and completely loved as we move closer to the origin of all love.   

Reflection/Discussion:

How does truth make us free?

 

Principles of Love:

Learning, Nature

 

Pray Through the Day:

Open our hearts and minds

To your love and wisdom

   

#236 (8/24)

Children of the Devil

 

John 8:37-47

 I know that you are descendants of Abraham; yet you look for an opportunity to kill me, because there is no place in you for my word.  I declare what I have seen in the Father’s presence; as for you, you should do what you have heard from the Father.”

 

They answered him, “Abraham is our father.” Jesus said to them, “If you were Abraham’s children, you would be doing what Abraham did, but now you are trying to kill me, a man who has told you the truth that I heard from God. This is not what Abraham did.  You are indeed doing what your father does.” They said to him, “We are not illegitimate children; we have one father, God himself.”  Jesus said to them, “If God were your Father, you would love me, for I came from God and now I am here. I did not come on my own, but he sent me.  Why do you not understand what I say? It is because you cannot accept my word.  You are from your father the devil, and you choose to do your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks according to his own nature, for he is a liar and the father of lies. But because I tell the truth, you do not believe me.  Which of you convicts me of sin? If I tell the truth, why do you not believe me?  Whoever is from God hears the words of God. The reason you do not hear them is that you are not from God.”

 Love is truth.  Sin is a lie.  Everything that comes from God is true.  Sin involves turning away from God, and therefore always contains a lie.  Lies that underlie sin can take many forms, but they usually include a desire for self-centered, short-term gain. 

Lies reveal part of the picture from a selfish perspective.  Truth takes into account, not only the present moment, but also the long term effects of our actions on anyone who may be touched by them.  Truth connects the past and future; it considers context, background, and implication.  Lies separate and judge whereas the truth recognizes that we are all children of the loving father who created our universe.

  

Reflection/Discussion:

What lies are part of our most common sins?

 

Principles of Love:

Nature; Opening; Vision

 

Pray Through the Day:

We were created

From God’s love

   

#237 (8/25)

Before Abraham

John 8:48-59

The Jews answered him, “Are we not right in saying that you are a Samaritan and have a demon?”  Jesus answered, “I do not have a demon; but I honor my Father, and you dishonor me.  Yet I do not seek my own glory; there is one who seeks it and he is the judge.  Very truly, I tell you, whoever keeps my word will never see death.”  The Jews said to him, “Now we know that you have a demon. Abraham died, and so did the prophets; yet you say, ‘Whoever keeps my word will never taste death.’  Are you greater than our father Abraham, who died? The prophets also died. Who do you claim to be?”  Jesus answered, “If I glorify myself, my glory is nothing. It is my Father who glorifies me, he of whom you say, ‘He is our God,’ though you do not know him. But I know him; if I would say that I do not know him, I would be a liar like you. But I do know him and I keep his word.  Your ancestor Abraham rejoiced that he would see my day; he saw it and was glad.”  Then the Jews said to him, “You are not yet fifty years old, and have you seen Abraham?”  Jesus said to them, “Very truly, I tell you, before Abraham was, I am.”  So they picked up stones to throw at him, but Jesus hid himself and went out of the temple.

 Love never dies because it is the source of life.  We can deny and turn away from love and bring about our own death, but love itself never dies.  The Jews who challenged Jesus seemed to have a very superficial understanding of God.  They thought Jesus was crazy because they had never fully experienced the depth of God’s love.  They blocked the love of our creator in their own hearts and therefore couldn’t recognize it in Jesus. We are at risk of sin and spiritual death whenever we fail to see God in our lives.  The problem is that it is extremely difficult for us to see love at every moment in our modern world.  We are distracted and diverted throughout our day and throughout our lives.  Love is always there but we seem incapable of remaining open to it at all times. This is the nature of life on earth at this time.  Trying harder to see and feel love only makes it more elusive.  Faith involves returning to love each time we realize we are moving away from it; every time we lose track and turn back we deepen our capacity for love.  If we need to be right all the time we will wind up throwing stones at love.  Returning to love cannot be forced or willed.   It is a process of patient opening:  recognizing and accepting our weakness and vulnerability; living through doubt and uncertainty; and allowing the natural longing for contact with our creator to deepen our appreciation of the living water of our loving God.  

Reflection/Discussion:

How can we become aware of when we are starting to move away from God’s love?

 

Principles of Love:

Nature; Learning

 

Pray Through the Day:

 

We were created

From God’s love

   

#238 (8/26)

Who Sinned?

 

John 9:1-5

As he walked along, he saw a man blind from birth.  His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”  Jesus answered, “Neither this man nor his parents sinned; he was born blind so that God’s works might be revealed in him.  We must work the works of him who sent me while it is day; night is coming when no one can work.  As long as I am in the world, I am the light of the world.”

 The disciples’ questions, like the comments of the scribes and Pharisees, are examples of trying to know God from the limitations of human understanding. In a novel called “Flatland,” Edwin Abbot tells the story of a square who lives in a two dimensional world.  When he discovers a third dimension, none of the geometric figures of his homeland can grasp what he is talking about and they reject and torment him.[1] Love brings a whole new dimension to life that extends well beyond human understanding.  Viewed from a narrow human perspective, punishment is an effective deterrent to sin.  It is true that we learn from the consequences of our actions, but punishment tends to sabotage relationships by creating avoidance and resentment rather than reconciliation and rapprochement. 

Jesus makes it clear that God’s view is much bigger than this. When a relationship is damaged there is need for clear action that addresses the transgression.  Love requires that we act with an open heart. When viewed under the light of love, even sin becomes an opportunity to strengthen our relationship with God by choosing to return to him thereby deepening our capacity for love.

  

Reflection/Discussion:

How can we maintain awareness of the limitations of our logic and perceptions?

 

Principles of Love:

Vision

 

Pray Through the Day:

Open our eyes

To deepen our love



[1]Abbott, Edwin A., Flatland: A Romance of Many Directions.